A letter to my Delta 5 family.

Delta 5, over the course of the last ten months I have loved you, I have hated you, I have relied on you, I have pretended like I didn't know you in public, I have shared laughs with you, I have gotten into arguments over stupid things with you, I have enjoyed every waking moment with you, I have learned from you, I have wanted to punch your faces in, I have cried because of you (both in happiness and out of frustration), I have been pushed, encouraged, and changed by you. For all of these reasons we have become a family. A very large, dysfunctional, strange, but happy... family.

I wish you all the happiness and joy and elation in the world, I hope your wildest dreams come true over the course of your lives, and I pray we never loose the bond that AmeriCorps has created between the thirteen of us.

You are all beautiful and inspiring in your own way and I can't begin to imagine what life would have been like had I never come into contact with your influences.

Denny: You've brought a new kind of laughter and sense of humor to my life that I will be able to enjoy for the rest of my life (or at least another year. See you in a month!)

JoJo: You were a little piece of home for me, not only because we share a similar geography but because your warm bubbly personality was always enough to get me to take a step back, take a breath, and just enjoy life.

Tony: I have never met anyone so chilled out and relaxed in my life. You take whatever is thrown your way with ease, a smile, and a beer. Three strengths I will be pulling from you over the next year!

Matt: Your outlook on life, conversation, and creativity were always a fresh of breath air. I had lost a particular creativity prior to joining AmeriCorps and you've helped reignite something for me.

Travis: I've never seen someone pour their whole self into their work before. Your work ethic is incredible and something I hope stays with me throughout the rest of my being.

Dahlke: Lady, you have such an excitement for life and you take on any situation like a champ. Ours is a friendship that has yet to bloom. We've got an exciting relationship to continue to build!

Leroy: I have said what I need to say to you, so I won't make a show of it here :) I will say though, you and I are pals to the end and the next time you see me I'm going to be a beast.

Aaron: You picked on me to the best of your ability and I can't thank you enough for it. From day one I've treated you with all the love hostility can hold and you've been sure to return the favor. You're my brother from another mother, thanks for the brotherly love.

Tommy-Guns: Thanks for letting me play the protective older sister role. Our geek spasms helped me retain a bit of home I didn't really get from anyone else in the Corps. Next time we see each other we'll have to bond over "other things" if you know what I mean. Ha!

Kari: You are definitely my AmeriBestie. No matter where our lives take us, we have a friendship that will pick up right where it left off whether it be a week later, a year later, or ten years later. I love you.

Chels: You should know there aren't many people I can tolerate when I need my "me time". Having you around when I thought I was going to break, when I needed to get away, when I wanted to ignore everyone on our team... I was so thankful for your calm and peaceful energy. Our coffee dates are what got me through this program at times.

MamaPaige: I can't say it enough. THANK YOU. I attribute a very large part of why I am coming back as a Team Leader to you. You poured everything you had into this team. You encouraged me like no one else could. I will always see you as a pillar of strength, as a mentor, and as a friend. Thank you.

37 posts in ten months? Not too bad...

Well. It’s been ten months and, contrary to what I thought many times over the course of these ten months, I am still alive.

I’ve had a great year. Looking back, re-reading these entries… I have most certainly wanted to die at times (or at least leave the program) and I’ve had many struggles, but this year has been phenomenal.

I had baseline today. (Sorry, this is going to be a very disjointed entry. Then again, they all are…) I half assed it. And Now I am kicking myself. I ran a minute slower than the last baseline. The last baseline, I tried! This time I half assed it and was ONLY a minute slower. If I had actually run it I wonder how much time I could have shaved off… Damn. Well, I guess I will just have to wait 2 weeks until I do this WHOLE THING OVER AGAIN to see what my time is like.

I have more information about the next class. There are 72 Corps Members, 7 Field Team Leaders, and 1 Support Team Leader (myself). The first round I will be working closely with the Service Learning staff member, second round they are planning on getting me out in the field with a team, third round the new class will come in and I will be helping with Team Leader Training, and fourth round is a part of third round and we’ll see what happens. Maybe, I’ll uh, get another team? Maybe? I don’t know. We’ll see. I won’t get my hopes up though.

I am going to miss Paige. A lot. She is thinking about coming back during my Team Leader Training (TLT) and leading a session! That would be grand. I would love to have her visit and see me in my green shirt.

I am SO excited to have my own room. With my own bathroom. I am SO excited to start my team leader year already! Sean, Jon, Sam and I are a great mix of corps members to be coming back. I’m really excited to work with them all.

OH! The best part! I am the Delta Unit’s support! I was hoping, hoping, hoping I would be a Delta again. And I am. Hooray. Jon and I are Delta Unit, Sam and Sean are River Unit. There are 3 females and 1 male joining the ranks, Delta gets the guy and 1 of the gals, River gets 2 gals. I’m excited to meet them.

I have nothing to do today until 2:30. I should have a packed schedule but I finished all my shit yesterday. I would like to cozy up in my bed and watch a movie on Netflix or waste my time on Facebook, but there is no internet in Johnson Hall! I have to go to Green Hall and if I go to Green Hall I have to put on my uniform so it doesn’t look like I’m wasting my day… even though… I will be. Oh my life is so tough.

My mom and dad will be here tomorrow! I’m so excited. I can’t wait to show them off and show off to them. So, mom and dad tomorrow, graduation Thursday, car shopping/Vicksburg touring Friday and Saturday, and HOME Sunday.

Best week ever. 

So much has happened in so few days.

I feel like I have been in Smithville/Amory Mississippi for a month at least. In actuality, I have been in the northern tip of Mississippi for nine days. NINE! We've been doing all sorts of work. Organizing warehouses, working in the distribution center, aiding MEMA and FEMA, sawing trees off properties, debris removal, home assessments, tarping houses, just wherever we are needed.

It has been triumphant at times, like removing trees from damaged homes, it has been frustrating at times, like moving goods from one warehouse to another with nothing but a small trailer when an 18-wheeler is in need. A lot of lag time, a lot of sitting and waiting, a lot of uncertainty in what the next hour not to mention the next day will bring.... A LOT of frustration.

I've had to remind myself daily, hourly, over and over again that this is the nature of volunteering in a disaster situation. Especially in a small community like Smithville, they have neighboring communities coming out to help in all of the areas that we as AmeriCorps can help... so to an extent we aren't needed. They need bulldozers and large contractors people with machine power to clear out the city so they can begin to rebuild.

That's where we can help. This campus is excellent at building affordable homes. I hope we'll be sponsored when it comes to that phase.

Anywho, working in this area hasn't been physically demanding like i thought it would be. It's been more mental than anything. Hours haven't been unbearable, but never knowing whats next, and dealing with last minute changes, and the constant need to be flexible and willing to go at the drop of a hat... that's been the toughest part. I already have a distaste for that sort of thing....

Tarping a roof

We saw, they drag. Tough work.

The front yard of a house we assessed.

The house.

Aaron striking a pose with an epic backdrop.

Another note, I am the talk of the TLs. I keep getting told how crazy I am for accepting this STL position. Current TLs keep reaching out and telling me not to hesitate to call them if I need anything, I even have a place to stay in New Orleans if it just becomes "too much". 

Awesome. 

What the hell have I signed up for?

It'll be good though. I was on the phone with my mom the other day talking about it. This past year has prepared me for my TL year, which is preparing me for a potential career I found in Edmonds, WA teaching Environmental Anthropology to kids. I have some school to finish up between STL and that position, but the direction my life is taking right now is so perfect. I'm ecstatic. 

SO. 4 more days of work. 13 days until I graduate. 15 days until I am home. 23 days until I start my year as a Support Team Leader. 

...let's ignore that last one for now though. Focus in the period of relaxation. 

Focus on home. 

Disaster

Keep the South in your prayers.

I have been in Jackson, MS the past week working on clearing trees and debris from the tornadoes that hit on May 17. It's been minor work compared to the more recent tornadoes, but work that needed to be done. These were some of the houses that were looked over or forgotten about about the initial hit so I am very happy we were able to help these families out.

Working at Mr. King's

Me in all my PPE

I forgot the after shot!

The house in the background was moved about 15 from its porch

This used to be a house

One of the families we helped (not pictured) were already rebuilding their home, 31 days and they were already in the cabinetry and caulking stages. Nancy and Ricky have fostered over 30 children and last April a tornado completely took out their house. Nothing left. They are the most optimistic, joyous, giving, loving, extraordinary people I have every met. They bought us lunch, took us fishing, provided us with loads of elk meat, and impacted us in a way that a couple of us won't ever be the same. I wish I could write more about them or show you pictures, but I haven't really got the time. Just know that there are incredible people in the world and they live near the Yazoo in Mississippi.

Tomorrow my team is heading to Smithville, MS. I know the news is mainly covering the damage in Tuscaloosa, AL, but Smithville is right up there with Alabama. The entire city has been wiped out. Nothing left. It's a small town of about 900 people, but when there is nowhere in your own city to turn to the devastation is drastic.

I am so proud to be a part of this organization and have the means to respond and help. These areas are dealing with a situation comparable to Katrina. If I were still in WA I don't know that I would, first - understand just how much need there is in the South and second - have any way to get out and help. Thank God for all the volunteers in this area.


Thank God I'm in this area.

Tornado watch! Which means no work.

No internet means fewer updates because when I DO get internet I am distracted by all of the magical websites out there that I forget all about this silly blog.

Also I'm lazy.

Quick updates followed my pictures:

Things are super!
I love working with the parks.
I love the team.

I am sick of the team environment though.
I can't tell you how much of a blessing it is going to be, to be the support team leader. God new what he was doing with this one. If I was stuck in a team situation for another 10 months, someone would surely die. Now, I will have a room to myself on a campus mostly to myself, working a steady job, in an office, with the perk of leading a team for one round. Excited.

I built a bridge. I laid mulch on a trail. I haven't cut down trees in a few days though.... I cleared an Indian mound of undergrowth.... I'm living outdoors in nature while I work. It's pretty damn awesome.

I leave for Bay St. Louis on May 5. Construction work for a week.
Then graduation.
Then home.
Then more AmeriCorps.

Bridge building

Aaron and I reconstructed a pillars built by the original CCC

Indian mound we cleared undergrowth off of. Much larger in real life.

Finally measured my 22s

I'm clearly paying attention to the Ranger

We will be friends for many many years to come. 

I'm moving to Tennessee

I am in McDonald’s working on a “paper” or so I told the man sitting across from me so he wouldn’t feel the urge to chat with me. He wants to sit at this table so he can play some stupid game McDonald’s now has at every booth in their restaurant. It’s making annoying noises. He chews with his mouth open. He has a friend who is sitting next to him not doing anything. Why the hell does McDonald’s have 50 different forms of entertainment throughout their place? It’s not enough they’re feeding people shit that makes them feel sluggish and apathetic? Now they have to entice them into staying forever and contribute to their laziness? I’m not exactly happy that McDonald’s is out source for the internet… I’m sitting in a greasy booth, with the smell of fatty food lingering about, listening to the bullshit beeping from the fry cooker and the obnoxious jingling coming from the game of  this… wonderful creature of a human sitting across from me.

I’m grumpy.

I’m exhausted.

…so I’m grumpy.

This program is wearing me out. It’s not even a tough round. It’s an easy round. I’m losing steam… my term is almost finished. And then I start my next term. Woo-wee….

__________

The man across from me keeps dancing in his seat every time he wins his game.

I want to punch him.

Okay, enough complaining.

Jackson Cave - First Day of Work

How’s Nashville you ask? Well, I don’t know. I’ve only been in the city once, for literally 30 minutes, to get my fingerprints done for STL. I live in Cedars of Lebanon which is the State Park in Lebanon, TN. Lebanon, is a small town trying to get bigger. It’s nice enough, a lot of chain restaurants, a big outlet mall, and farms. Living in a State Park though? AWESOME. I have a hiking trail that literally leads up to my back door. I wake up to a view of the forest every morning, I have incredible trails to run daily, I’ve learned enough about the trees and birds in this region I can call them out by sight, and I have my own room in a wonderful little cabin, with a cute little front porch.

Part of the trail in my backyard

It’s been a great location.

The work? Well, I’ve been able to use my chainsaw just about every day on the trail. I’m pretty awesome at felling trees. It’s my favorite thing to do and I get excited when the trees get bigger and bigger. When I’m not sawing I’m lopping branches off of trees and making trails wider. We’ve built 5 animal shelters out of these cut/limbed trees.

Limbing trees

Aaron next to one of the animal shelters

Yesterday I hiked 7 miles and did trail maintenance. It was probably the best day of work so far. Beautiful weather, great trail/view, and we found campsites. Monday we’re building a bridge? Or something awesome like that. Wednesday we’re going to be working in a stream to promote dragonfly populations. I’m supposed to be working in an archaeological park near Indian mounds at some point to. I LOVE THIS PROJECT.

Kari and I on our 7 mile work hike

We have spring break next Friday to Monday. I think I’m going to Memphis with a teammate? He lives there and has invited us to visit his home and family. We just have to get the van approved for the trip.

Then, one final week of work and I’m off to Bay St. Louis for two weeks to work construction. Then I graduate. Then I go home for ten days. Then I go back to Vicksburg, MS for eleven months.

Shit… is getting real.

I'm not grumpy anymore. I just needed to type it out I guess.  

Clinically insane? Probably.

Well hello again, to all my friends....

I've been in Vicksburg, MS for transition since last Monday. Going through more trainings, meetings, debriefs, briefings, the norm. It's been with my new team though, which has been super nice. Kari and Aaron are on the composite team with me, and I have three new friends from River unit, Jon, John, and Colin. Jamison is out Team Leader. We're going to be a kick ass team. Nashville Tennessee to help restore State Parks? Yes, please! We leave on Tuesday and start work on Wednesday.

I've contacted a man in Nashville who works in setting up community gardens and educating locals in healthy eating. I'm hoping to work heavily with him and create some long lasting connections in that area.

Funding. If you aren't following the budget cuts, particularly the one related to CNCS, Obama has extended the deadline until April 8. So we're left in the dark, again, about what will happen with AmeriCorps. Part of me is okay with this toying of my emotions, no set answer, but only because it means we aren't being shut down... yet. The other part wants to kick and scream, "You idiots! Clearly if it's causing this much of a ruckus it's because these programs you're trying to shut down are NEEDED!"

...

As of right now, I will be in this program until April 8. On that day, there will either be a freeze on our funds and we will be sent back to campus, without graduating, to wait... for what? Who bloody knows. I assume we will be sent home. If we are not sent to campus/home on April 8 it will be because the Senate finally came to their senses and realize they should fund something like citizens getting involved in their communities OR Obama signed some other piece of paper to extend the deadline for a few more weeks.

IN OTHER NEWS:

I was called into Brendan's (my unit leader) office last Tuesday. He offered me the position of Support Team Leader for the June class. It took me a couple days of intense back-and-forth emotions, long conversations with the current STLs and Brendan, many many many questions, support from my siblings and parents..... and I finally said yes.

It's not the position I wanted. I wanted Field Team Leader and it took Brendan a little bit of schmoozing to get me to see the perks of the position... It was ultimately my decision and even after just about every current STL I talked to told me it was the most stressful thing ever and if I thought even just a little bit that I might not want it, I should RUN.... I still said yes.

It's going to be hard. It's going to be stressful. It's going to be boring, and lonely, and I'm going to hate it at times. But there is just so much to learn from this position, get my foot in the door for the professional world, learn the behind-the-scenes of a workplace other than at a daycare, network!, and be that leader I've always seen myself becoming one day.

I'm scared, sure, but I know this is where my life is supposed to go next. The South isn't through with me yet. I'm very excited for this next year.

I need to buy a car though...which means more saving, less boozing.

Waiting for the tattoo parlor to open...

I’m at Hey! Café on Magazine Street in New Orleans. So great. Quiet, chill, delicious freaking chai, and I just saw a sign that says they’re a “favorite place on Google”. Oh, and their wireless server is called Youre a champion. Awesome.

They have pictures on the wall of this place as a
barber shop way back in the day

I really love this city and I absolutely love this area of town. I thought I would be ecstatic to have only a week left here, but I’m beginning to realize just how sad it is going to be to leave. Not just the city, I’ve finally gotten used to being a site supervisor and I actually think I enjoy it. Damn Ashley, a day late don’t you think?

I put myself through a mock-baseline today. This transition will be the first baseline I’ve run since the original; what with my sickness the second baseline and inclement weather the third. I better have improved! My mock test was pretty great. I’m under 14 minutes for the mile and a half for sure, my crunches just don’t stop, and my push-ups have improved by one or two… which is a milestone for me.

Gosh this chai is great… they even steamed the milk for me and added espresso.

I only have a couple months left in this program. I think I’m going to miss it. I mean unless I get team leader and then I’m going to loathe it for another ten months, but deep down, I love this program. It’s pretty damn amazing. I can’t tell you how much I’ve grown in the last 8 months. As a person, as a leader, as a contributing member to society… I know exactly who I am, I have direction in where I want my life to take me, and I’ve found an incredible way to serve my country.

It’s pretty awesome.

Everyone should do something like AmeriCorps. EVERYONE. Vista, State and National, or NCCC. Look into it. So many outlets in so many fields, it’s too incredible not to join.

That is of course, if AmeriCorps is still up and running for very long. If you follow me on facebook you’ve seen the many “save AmeriCorps” links I’ve posted. Funding has been extended to April 8, by the way. So our waiting game has gone into overtime. We’ll have to wait and see what happens I guess.

If you’re unaware of what I’m talking about, feel free to check out this here link and become aware. It was written on March 7 so it doesn't have any of the new information, but it's still pretty informative. I think the entire H.R. 1 bill is something we as Americans should be looking into and speaking up about. 

In other picture news:

Kari and I went on another nature walk around the swamp next to our house.
Man made canals look cool, but smell like shit. And have dead nutria floating around.

Then I hate a burrito on our roof. 

Kari ate subway on the roof with me. 

Stealing is wrong. Unless it is internet from your neighbor. Then it's their own damn fault for not password protecting.

Okay. It’s going to be a long update. Hopefully I’ll be entertaining enough that you’ll read all the way through.

First Topic: St. Bernard Project

This is my sponsor this round. I was sent through three weeks of training in mold remediation, insulation, drywall, mudding, flooring, and finishing work. I can not tell you how amazing it feels and how empowering it is to have all of these skills under my belt. The three weeks of training I went through was nothing but. I woke up everyday so excited to go to work and learn with Delta 6 (the team that came down with us) on a house. SO MUCH FUN. Then, the three week training period ended and we were sent out to site supervise our own house. STRESS THROUGH THE ROOF. Running your own house, leading groups of volunteers, teaching these skills to people who have never been on a construction…. This shit just isn’t for me. I do well enough with it I think, I just stress myself out way to much over it. I’ve been one of the lucky few who have a co-site supervisor most days. I’m really pretty great at everything I’ve been taught, I just have an issue with being able to teach it to others.

Table saw training. Sweet Shades, I know

I thought for a while I just sucked at leading volunteers (which was overwhelming and discouraging because I want to be a Team Leader later this year – more on that later), but then I was put on a mold house which doesn’t take any skill, you scrub, rub, paint, and fog, so you don’t have to teach anything. I was awesome at leading those volunteers. I hung out, cracked jokes, was very informative about the New Orleans area, answered questions, rallied the team when I needed to… it was great. I can lead. I just lose faith in myself when I have to lead volunteers on something I’m not even sure I’m great at, like mudding. I’ve been working on it though, rebuilding that confidence, asking questions when I need to, and faking it when I don’t get immediate answers. I think I’ll probably finally have the hang of it in the next two weeks – which is when I leave! Awesome.

Painting baseboard training. It's confusing work. 

…actually, it is awesome, because these are important things to have in being a team leader. This project has been the most difficult, my least favorite, and incredibly stressful. However, it is the one I have grown most in. I wanted to be a team leader during CTI, but didn’t think I could actually handle it. First and second round, I thought about applying, but constantly second guessed myself in whether or not I could handle it. With only two weeks left in this round and all that I’ve been through, I know I can handle it. Which leads me to….

Second Topic: Team Leader Interview

It was last week. I don’t think I did great. I know everyone says that… but for realsies. I was just okay. I didn’t completely suck, but I didn’t completely blow them away with a totally awesome interview. I was just okay.

This is where I took my phone interview. The back room of a house in the process of mold remediation during a thunder and lightening storm. The house had no windows. It was nice and loud for me. 

I started off great. I was confident, spoke clearly, calmly, and coolly. Then they started asking me questions, I hadn’t thought about. Like what would I do if I had a corps member who felt like they didn’t belong to the team and wasn’t enjoying they’re time in AmeriCorps. …Well, shit. I don’t know what I would do. I said I would talk to that individual, to get a better understanding as to why. Then I said that I found that question difficult, I’m not entirely sure what I would do, I would have to call someone, like the campus counselor or my unit leader and ask for help.

…shit.

I was just okay.

So now, I’m stressing like crazy about the interview. Okay is not a good feeling. I’d much rather have the feeling that I was horrible. It would be easier to deal with. Right now I feel like it could go either way and I don’t know how to prepare for that.

I need to stop worrying though, I’m making myself sick. My head wont stop pounding, my throat has been sore for a few days, I’m incredibly tired. Which makes me worry that my mono is going to relapse. Which stresses me out even more!

Shit!  Next, non-stressful topic!

Third Topic: Mardi Gras

Was so great! St, Charles Avenue was the place to be, and I was definitely there, 5 days straight! Parades, booze, making friends with strangers, dancing, more booze. I cannot believe I had the energy to keep going. It was too much! I have soooo many beads it’s insane and I didn’t have to show my boobies for them! Just bat my pretty lashes and smile. I got roses, and stuffed animals, and cups, and I can’t wait to send them all to my nieces and nephews.

The REX Parade

Beads and Booze

Fourth Topic: New Orleans

This is such an incredible city. I think everyone should come down and visit for 2 months at the least! It’s so big and vibrant and exciting and there is just too much to see and do and learn! Garden District is so beautiful, I could live there forever. French quarter is a ton of fun, such a great area day and night. Uptown has got some terrific little shops. Those are really the only areas I’ve explored, I know if I had time to adventure out more often I’d fall in love with all of the other areas of New Orleans.

The south just continues to win my heart. Northwest, you better watch your back.

For funsies: Team Yoga pic

Life without an internet connection...

...means less internet updates!


St. Bernard Project. So much too say, too lazy to type it.
Over all I am enjoying the project. I've been sufficiently trained in construction and I've been forced to become comfortable in leading a group of people.

It has been incredibly difficult at times, but it has also been incredibly fun at times. I still struggle a little with the new team, but I have grown tremendously on this project round. I have been told by many previous corps members that third round is the toughest.... they were completely right.



None of this makes any sense. I'll have to try this again some other time.

It's Mardi Gras weekend...... I'm exhausted and in a perpetual state of being hung over.

Coffee.

After almost 6 months of living and working in AmeriCorps NCCC, I've come to realize something about myself. I love coffee. I love it... SO much. 

This isn't a shock to anyone who knows me. It's obvious I enjoy a cup, or two or three, of coffee, or a daily latte. But coffee, I've realized, is so much more to me. It's my release. When I get stressed, annoyed, angry, feel suffocated by everyone, grumpy in anyway... I go grab a hot steamy mug of coffee or find my way to the nearest coffee house and just ignore everyone and everything until I feel like I can forget about my problems or deal with them. I spend so much money on coffee and I've tried cutting back, but I honestly think I would go insane without it. Coffee has become my sanity. 

Having said that, let me inform you that I am at a coffee house right now. 

I told my Team Leader that I hated this team a couple days ago. Today I told her our team is pretty awesome. She called me out on it. I laughed. Then I realized I don't hate this team. I hate that I have to learn a new system, and new dynamics, and new ways to deal with the new team. Now that I see that, I think this round will be a bit easier. Not easy, easier. I'm still struggling with not having Chelsea to go out with and just chill and relax and ignore the AmeriWorld with. I hate that Lisa and I started forming a definite friendship, one that will last outside of AmeriCorps, and were split up. I hate that Aaron and I no longer have the let's-pick-on-each-other-like-brother-and-sister relationship to look forward to everyday (except through text). It fucking sucks. However, I have made huge strides in how I deal with change and misfortune. I'm upset about how things played out, but not defeated. Aaron asked me the other day if i was still content with being in AmeriCorps. I told him I was until the work day ended. I don't think that is so true anymore. I just need to adjust. And I am so thankful that I have a Team Leader willing to listen and  to challenge me and to help me through it. 

__________________________________________

So, what am I doing this round you ask?

I just finished the first week of Construction Site Supervisor Training. That's right. I'm going to be a site super, on a construction site...

I didn't think it was possible either! But we have had training in insulation, drywall, mudding, and mold remediation so far and I gotta say... I'm freaking awesome! our trainers are incredible. They're teaching us the techniques but they are really instilling a confidence I didn't know I could have. I still have two weeks of training left before they put me on my site and already i feel comfortable with the though of leading a group of volunteers by myself. 

The houses we'll be supervising are homes still needing to be rebuilt after Katrina. Each of us will have our own house to supervise. 

I'm living in Chalmette, LA which like all of the New Orleans area was hit hard by The Storm. These houses sat in water 6-24 feet for 2-4 weeks. Then when families were given the okay to come home, they were being told their homeowner's insurance only covered what damage wasn't caused by flooding, and their houses had recently been rezoned and weren't covered by flood insurance anymore. So some called in private contractors to rebuild for them, only to fall victim of construction fraud. You've heard the stories of the FEMA trailors. A place to live until you start getting sick from the formaldehyde. Whoops, sorry, let's recall those. Now you're homeless. I worked on a house whose homeowner has been living in the shed behind his house. He got plumbing the day we were there. no walls in his house yet, but he was ecstatic because he had a toilet. he christened that thing while we were there too! 

It's so crazy. I've been asking why are things still like this since the day I got into town. I've realized it's because we don't live in a Utopia. I forget that sometimes. I like to think the community takes care of itself and everyone takes care of each other, but that's not how it is. It's up to the individual to fix their own situation. Sure, there is an outreach going on, but it's not big enough. It's not enough period. St. Bernard Project, the non-profit I am working with, is putting forth a tremendous effort to get people home. There are other organizations in the area doing the same thing, but there should be more! More should be happening! It's frustrating.

Me, prepping for insulation installation. 

Drywall sawing and supervising.

Measurin' and Measurin' and Cuttin'

I don't see all negative. I see the hope alive in this city, in the individuals helping, in the residents, and it's so exciting to be a part of it. I just have to remind myself constantly, like I said before, we don't live in a Utopian world. I am, though, glad that I am part of a group who is trying to get at least a taste of it out there. 

I should be working on my resume....

...but that's no fun!

I've heard some people complaining about how long transitions are, but I really appreciate this down time. Especially when they designate such large blocks of time to work on things like resumes, job applications, college applications, ect. ...because it allows me time to ignore those things and update my blog! Ha.

I have five months left. Holy dang. It seems like such a long time. I'm looking forward to these last five months but I am also itching to go on to the next thing! Even though, I'm fairly sure the next thing for me... is Team Leader...so I would still be doing that same thing, but different. I still have a "shit-ton" (as a kitchen mate would say) of experience and skills to be learned before I am anywhere near ready to lead a group of 8-10 peers.

So I talked to my Unit Leader. I have talked to my Team Leader. I have talked to many Corps Members and friends. They all seem to be supportive of my interest in Team Leader. A lot of my friends here have expressed that they think I would be excellent. Which is nice to know. Paige was telling me about when she filled out her Team Leader app and how she realized how important it was to her to get the position because of how stressed she was. I then immediately realized how important the position is to me because of how much I am stressing.

So, I keep telling people I'm thinking about becoming a Team leader, but I really want to be a Team Leader. And I want to do it in Vicksburg. We shall see. I have a back up plan just in case, but I really hope I don't need to use it.

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So, the life of a Corps Member, involves van cleanings. It is my absolute favorite to see all the government vehicles lined up being cleaned and inspected. I'm not sure why, maybe it's because it a routine thing and everyone has to do it and all the teams are located in one area at once, blaring music, chatting, and enjoying what we can out of the monotony, but I love it. We cleaned out vans today, which is why this topic was brought up:

This is a view of my favorite spot on campus. Sitting in the bay window in the second floor lounge with the view of the chapeltorium. If only the window wasn't so dirty this picture would be a lot more appealing. This is where I am sitting now. About to go back to resume writing and application filling. Enjoy your day, family (and anyone else who happens to be reading).

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Food for Thought:


Compassion impels us to work tirelessly to alleviate the suffering of our fellow creatures, to dethrone ourselves from the centre of our world and put another there, and to honour the inviolable sanctity of every single human being, treating everybody, without exception, with absolute justice, equity and respect. –Karen Armstrong Twelve Steps to a Compassionate Life

Oh me, Oh my.

So. I've been back on campus a for almost a week now. Things are weird, but normal at the same time. I feel like I am home, though I still don't consider Vicksburg my home. I no longer consider all these people around me strictly Corps Members, but friends and family. This whole new life has finally become real. It's no longer a "program I am in" it's just my life. It's a love/hate relationship I have with this realization.

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Chels, Dahlke, and Aaron seem to be integrating into their new teams well enough... There are moments for them I'm sure. I'm doing well with it. I have times when I see the team together and we're having a good time and I notice some people are missing and it really really sucks. I'm sure things will get fairly close to normal by the time we leave for spike, being on seperate teams, but then when we leave for spike it will hit full force and it will REALLY really suck.

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I have to brag a bit:

Sunday: I did the Insanity workout (like P90X) AND I ran a mile and a half.
Monday: I did Insanity AND Corps PT.
Today: I did Insanity.
Tomorrow: I will do Insanity AND Corps PT.


SHIT FREAKING YEAH!


It feels great.
My eating habits have changed tremendously. I am a vegetarian. It definitely helps my control in making healthy food decisions.


I'm really taking this health/lifestyle change to a whole new level.


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I am going to talk to Brendan (my Unit Leader) tomorrow about becoming a Team Leader. I am about 90% sure I want to do it. I have some questions I'd like answered before the final decision.

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We took some electives today, I learned about careers in the government and Wade (the instructor/staff member on campus) helped steer me in the right direction in my search for careers that set up clean water sources on a global basis.

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Even with the frustrations.... I am in love with my life.

Stuck in an airport!

I am currently in the Idaho Falls Regional Airport. Waiting for fog to lift in SLC so that I can continue my journey east, back to Vicksburg. Perfect time for a blog update!

Not that I have the energy to update all that has gone on since the last entry. Because so much has gone on. Too much, infact. The Louisville project ended really great, it was sad go leave but exciting to go back to campus and prepare for winter break. Un til we got back to campus and heard that sixteen Deltas had left the Corps. SIXTEEN. This means there are teams with only five individuals on them. Which means corps members are going to be shuffled around to make even, and better functioning teams. A lot of Deltas are unhappy with there current teams and have threatened to leave the program if a change isn't made. If too many more people leave it wont make the program look good and funding for next year could be shot.

Fine. A shuffle. Understandable. Five member teams won't get projects done for sponsors. But, shit, it sucks. Lisa, Chelsea, and Aaron are no longer Delta 5s. Lisa and Chelsea are Delta 4 and Aaron is Delta 1. They picked people off of teams to fill holes and threw the misfits on new teams. Like I said, I understand it, I just don't agree with how they did it. The people chosen feel like they're being targeted. There are now three huge holes left in the team's dynamic. I feel like they should have just mixed up all members of all teams and started from scratch. Or maybe they should just choose better applicants next time.


Christmas break, though, was really great. I've missed my family so much and I really needed the boost seeing them gave me to finish out these last five months.

The next two weeks will be filled with trainings in Vicksburg and then the newly shaped Delta 5 will head to Chalmette, Louisiana to work with the St. Bernard's Project in rebuilding homes that were destroyed by Katrina.

Now if you'll excuse me I have a very  Langoliers type airport to get back to being bored in.