A letter to my Delta 5 family.

Delta 5, over the course of the last ten months I have loved you, I have hated you, I have relied on you, I have pretended like I didn't know you in public, I have shared laughs with you, I have gotten into arguments over stupid things with you, I have enjoyed every waking moment with you, I have learned from you, I have wanted to punch your faces in, I have cried because of you (both in happiness and out of frustration), I have been pushed, encouraged, and changed by you. For all of these reasons we have become a family. A very large, dysfunctional, strange, but happy... family.

I wish you all the happiness and joy and elation in the world, I hope your wildest dreams come true over the course of your lives, and I pray we never loose the bond that AmeriCorps has created between the thirteen of us.

You are all beautiful and inspiring in your own way and I can't begin to imagine what life would have been like had I never come into contact with your influences.

Denny: You've brought a new kind of laughter and sense of humor to my life that I will be able to enjoy for the rest of my life (or at least another year. See you in a month!)

JoJo: You were a little piece of home for me, not only because we share a similar geography but because your warm bubbly personality was always enough to get me to take a step back, take a breath, and just enjoy life.

Tony: I have never met anyone so chilled out and relaxed in my life. You take whatever is thrown your way with ease, a smile, and a beer. Three strengths I will be pulling from you over the next year!

Matt: Your outlook on life, conversation, and creativity were always a fresh of breath air. I had lost a particular creativity prior to joining AmeriCorps and you've helped reignite something for me.

Travis: I've never seen someone pour their whole self into their work before. Your work ethic is incredible and something I hope stays with me throughout the rest of my being.

Dahlke: Lady, you have such an excitement for life and you take on any situation like a champ. Ours is a friendship that has yet to bloom. We've got an exciting relationship to continue to build!

Leroy: I have said what I need to say to you, so I won't make a show of it here :) I will say though, you and I are pals to the end and the next time you see me I'm going to be a beast.

Aaron: You picked on me to the best of your ability and I can't thank you enough for it. From day one I've treated you with all the love hostility can hold and you've been sure to return the favor. You're my brother from another mother, thanks for the brotherly love.

Tommy-Guns: Thanks for letting me play the protective older sister role. Our geek spasms helped me retain a bit of home I didn't really get from anyone else in the Corps. Next time we see each other we'll have to bond over "other things" if you know what I mean. Ha!

Kari: You are definitely my AmeriBestie. No matter where our lives take us, we have a friendship that will pick up right where it left off whether it be a week later, a year later, or ten years later. I love you.

Chels: You should know there aren't many people I can tolerate when I need my "me time". Having you around when I thought I was going to break, when I needed to get away, when I wanted to ignore everyone on our team... I was so thankful for your calm and peaceful energy. Our coffee dates are what got me through this program at times.

MamaPaige: I can't say it enough. THANK YOU. I attribute a very large part of why I am coming back as a Team Leader to you. You poured everything you had into this team. You encouraged me like no one else could. I will always see you as a pillar of strength, as a mentor, and as a friend. Thank you.

37 posts in ten months? Not too bad...

Well. It’s been ten months and, contrary to what I thought many times over the course of these ten months, I am still alive.

I’ve had a great year. Looking back, re-reading these entries… I have most certainly wanted to die at times (or at least leave the program) and I’ve had many struggles, but this year has been phenomenal.

I had baseline today. (Sorry, this is going to be a very disjointed entry. Then again, they all are…) I half assed it. And Now I am kicking myself. I ran a minute slower than the last baseline. The last baseline, I tried! This time I half assed it and was ONLY a minute slower. If I had actually run it I wonder how much time I could have shaved off… Damn. Well, I guess I will just have to wait 2 weeks until I do this WHOLE THING OVER AGAIN to see what my time is like.

I have more information about the next class. There are 72 Corps Members, 7 Field Team Leaders, and 1 Support Team Leader (myself). The first round I will be working closely with the Service Learning staff member, second round they are planning on getting me out in the field with a team, third round the new class will come in and I will be helping with Team Leader Training, and fourth round is a part of third round and we’ll see what happens. Maybe, I’ll uh, get another team? Maybe? I don’t know. We’ll see. I won’t get my hopes up though.

I am going to miss Paige. A lot. She is thinking about coming back during my Team Leader Training (TLT) and leading a session! That would be grand. I would love to have her visit and see me in my green shirt.

I am SO excited to have my own room. With my own bathroom. I am SO excited to start my team leader year already! Sean, Jon, Sam and I are a great mix of corps members to be coming back. I’m really excited to work with them all.

OH! The best part! I am the Delta Unit’s support! I was hoping, hoping, hoping I would be a Delta again. And I am. Hooray. Jon and I are Delta Unit, Sam and Sean are River Unit. There are 3 females and 1 male joining the ranks, Delta gets the guy and 1 of the gals, River gets 2 gals. I’m excited to meet them.

I have nothing to do today until 2:30. I should have a packed schedule but I finished all my shit yesterday. I would like to cozy up in my bed and watch a movie on Netflix or waste my time on Facebook, but there is no internet in Johnson Hall! I have to go to Green Hall and if I go to Green Hall I have to put on my uniform so it doesn’t look like I’m wasting my day… even though… I will be. Oh my life is so tough.

My mom and dad will be here tomorrow! I’m so excited. I can’t wait to show them off and show off to them. So, mom and dad tomorrow, graduation Thursday, car shopping/Vicksburg touring Friday and Saturday, and HOME Sunday.

Best week ever. 

So much has happened in so few days.

I feel like I have been in Smithville/Amory Mississippi for a month at least. In actuality, I have been in the northern tip of Mississippi for nine days. NINE! We've been doing all sorts of work. Organizing warehouses, working in the distribution center, aiding MEMA and FEMA, sawing trees off properties, debris removal, home assessments, tarping houses, just wherever we are needed.

It has been triumphant at times, like removing trees from damaged homes, it has been frustrating at times, like moving goods from one warehouse to another with nothing but a small trailer when an 18-wheeler is in need. A lot of lag time, a lot of sitting and waiting, a lot of uncertainty in what the next hour not to mention the next day will bring.... A LOT of frustration.

I've had to remind myself daily, hourly, over and over again that this is the nature of volunteering in a disaster situation. Especially in a small community like Smithville, they have neighboring communities coming out to help in all of the areas that we as AmeriCorps can help... so to an extent we aren't needed. They need bulldozers and large contractors people with machine power to clear out the city so they can begin to rebuild.

That's where we can help. This campus is excellent at building affordable homes. I hope we'll be sponsored when it comes to that phase.

Anywho, working in this area hasn't been physically demanding like i thought it would be. It's been more mental than anything. Hours haven't been unbearable, but never knowing whats next, and dealing with last minute changes, and the constant need to be flexible and willing to go at the drop of a hat... that's been the toughest part. I already have a distaste for that sort of thing....

Tarping a roof

We saw, they drag. Tough work.

The front yard of a house we assessed.

The house.

Aaron striking a pose with an epic backdrop.

Another note, I am the talk of the TLs. I keep getting told how crazy I am for accepting this STL position. Current TLs keep reaching out and telling me not to hesitate to call them if I need anything, I even have a place to stay in New Orleans if it just becomes "too much". 

Awesome. 

What the hell have I signed up for?

It'll be good though. I was on the phone with my mom the other day talking about it. This past year has prepared me for my TL year, which is preparing me for a potential career I found in Edmonds, WA teaching Environmental Anthropology to kids. I have some school to finish up between STL and that position, but the direction my life is taking right now is so perfect. I'm ecstatic. 

SO. 4 more days of work. 13 days until I graduate. 15 days until I am home. 23 days until I start my year as a Support Team Leader. 

...let's ignore that last one for now though. Focus in the period of relaxation. 

Focus on home. 

Disaster

Keep the South in your prayers.

I have been in Jackson, MS the past week working on clearing trees and debris from the tornadoes that hit on May 17. It's been minor work compared to the more recent tornadoes, but work that needed to be done. These were some of the houses that were looked over or forgotten about about the initial hit so I am very happy we were able to help these families out.

Working at Mr. King's

Me in all my PPE

I forgot the after shot!

The house in the background was moved about 15 from its porch

This used to be a house

One of the families we helped (not pictured) were already rebuilding their home, 31 days and they were already in the cabinetry and caulking stages. Nancy and Ricky have fostered over 30 children and last April a tornado completely took out their house. Nothing left. They are the most optimistic, joyous, giving, loving, extraordinary people I have every met. They bought us lunch, took us fishing, provided us with loads of elk meat, and impacted us in a way that a couple of us won't ever be the same. I wish I could write more about them or show you pictures, but I haven't really got the time. Just know that there are incredible people in the world and they live near the Yazoo in Mississippi.

Tomorrow my team is heading to Smithville, MS. I know the news is mainly covering the damage in Tuscaloosa, AL, but Smithville is right up there with Alabama. The entire city has been wiped out. Nothing left. It's a small town of about 900 people, but when there is nowhere in your own city to turn to the devastation is drastic.

I am so proud to be a part of this organization and have the means to respond and help. These areas are dealing with a situation comparable to Katrina. If I were still in WA I don't know that I would, first - understand just how much need there is in the South and second - have any way to get out and help. Thank God for all the volunteers in this area.


Thank God I'm in this area.

Tornado watch! Which means no work.

No internet means fewer updates because when I DO get internet I am distracted by all of the magical websites out there that I forget all about this silly blog.

Also I'm lazy.

Quick updates followed my pictures:

Things are super!
I love working with the parks.
I love the team.

I am sick of the team environment though.
I can't tell you how much of a blessing it is going to be, to be the support team leader. God new what he was doing with this one. If I was stuck in a team situation for another 10 months, someone would surely die. Now, I will have a room to myself on a campus mostly to myself, working a steady job, in an office, with the perk of leading a team for one round. Excited.

I built a bridge. I laid mulch on a trail. I haven't cut down trees in a few days though.... I cleared an Indian mound of undergrowth.... I'm living outdoors in nature while I work. It's pretty damn awesome.

I leave for Bay St. Louis on May 5. Construction work for a week.
Then graduation.
Then home.
Then more AmeriCorps.

Bridge building

Aaron and I reconstructed a pillars built by the original CCC

Indian mound we cleared undergrowth off of. Much larger in real life.

Finally measured my 22s

I'm clearly paying attention to the Ranger

We will be friends for many many years to come. 

I'm moving to Tennessee

I am in McDonald’s working on a “paper” or so I told the man sitting across from me so he wouldn’t feel the urge to chat with me. He wants to sit at this table so he can play some stupid game McDonald’s now has at every booth in their restaurant. It’s making annoying noises. He chews with his mouth open. He has a friend who is sitting next to him not doing anything. Why the hell does McDonald’s have 50 different forms of entertainment throughout their place? It’s not enough they’re feeding people shit that makes them feel sluggish and apathetic? Now they have to entice them into staying forever and contribute to their laziness? I’m not exactly happy that McDonald’s is out source for the internet… I’m sitting in a greasy booth, with the smell of fatty food lingering about, listening to the bullshit beeping from the fry cooker and the obnoxious jingling coming from the game of  this… wonderful creature of a human sitting across from me.

I’m grumpy.

I’m exhausted.

…so I’m grumpy.

This program is wearing me out. It’s not even a tough round. It’s an easy round. I’m losing steam… my term is almost finished. And then I start my next term. Woo-wee….

__________

The man across from me keeps dancing in his seat every time he wins his game.

I want to punch him.

Okay, enough complaining.

Jackson Cave - First Day of Work

How’s Nashville you ask? Well, I don’t know. I’ve only been in the city once, for literally 30 minutes, to get my fingerprints done for STL. I live in Cedars of Lebanon which is the State Park in Lebanon, TN. Lebanon, is a small town trying to get bigger. It’s nice enough, a lot of chain restaurants, a big outlet mall, and farms. Living in a State Park though? AWESOME. I have a hiking trail that literally leads up to my back door. I wake up to a view of the forest every morning, I have incredible trails to run daily, I’ve learned enough about the trees and birds in this region I can call them out by sight, and I have my own room in a wonderful little cabin, with a cute little front porch.

Part of the trail in my backyard

It’s been a great location.

The work? Well, I’ve been able to use my chainsaw just about every day on the trail. I’m pretty awesome at felling trees. It’s my favorite thing to do and I get excited when the trees get bigger and bigger. When I’m not sawing I’m lopping branches off of trees and making trails wider. We’ve built 5 animal shelters out of these cut/limbed trees.

Limbing trees

Aaron next to one of the animal shelters

Yesterday I hiked 7 miles and did trail maintenance. It was probably the best day of work so far. Beautiful weather, great trail/view, and we found campsites. Monday we’re building a bridge? Or something awesome like that. Wednesday we’re going to be working in a stream to promote dragonfly populations. I’m supposed to be working in an archaeological park near Indian mounds at some point to. I LOVE THIS PROJECT.

Kari and I on our 7 mile work hike

We have spring break next Friday to Monday. I think I’m going to Memphis with a teammate? He lives there and has invited us to visit his home and family. We just have to get the van approved for the trip.

Then, one final week of work and I’m off to Bay St. Louis for two weeks to work construction. Then I graduate. Then I go home for ten days. Then I go back to Vicksburg, MS for eleven months.

Shit… is getting real.

I'm not grumpy anymore. I just needed to type it out I guess.  

Clinically insane? Probably.

Well hello again, to all my friends....

I've been in Vicksburg, MS for transition since last Monday. Going through more trainings, meetings, debriefs, briefings, the norm. It's been with my new team though, which has been super nice. Kari and Aaron are on the composite team with me, and I have three new friends from River unit, Jon, John, and Colin. Jamison is out Team Leader. We're going to be a kick ass team. Nashville Tennessee to help restore State Parks? Yes, please! We leave on Tuesday and start work on Wednesday.

I've contacted a man in Nashville who works in setting up community gardens and educating locals in healthy eating. I'm hoping to work heavily with him and create some long lasting connections in that area.

Funding. If you aren't following the budget cuts, particularly the one related to CNCS, Obama has extended the deadline until April 8. So we're left in the dark, again, about what will happen with AmeriCorps. Part of me is okay with this toying of my emotions, no set answer, but only because it means we aren't being shut down... yet. The other part wants to kick and scream, "You idiots! Clearly if it's causing this much of a ruckus it's because these programs you're trying to shut down are NEEDED!"

...

As of right now, I will be in this program until April 8. On that day, there will either be a freeze on our funds and we will be sent back to campus, without graduating, to wait... for what? Who bloody knows. I assume we will be sent home. If we are not sent to campus/home on April 8 it will be because the Senate finally came to their senses and realize they should fund something like citizens getting involved in their communities OR Obama signed some other piece of paper to extend the deadline for a few more weeks.

IN OTHER NEWS:

I was called into Brendan's (my unit leader) office last Tuesday. He offered me the position of Support Team Leader for the June class. It took me a couple days of intense back-and-forth emotions, long conversations with the current STLs and Brendan, many many many questions, support from my siblings and parents..... and I finally said yes.

It's not the position I wanted. I wanted Field Team Leader and it took Brendan a little bit of schmoozing to get me to see the perks of the position... It was ultimately my decision and even after just about every current STL I talked to told me it was the most stressful thing ever and if I thought even just a little bit that I might not want it, I should RUN.... I still said yes.

It's going to be hard. It's going to be stressful. It's going to be boring, and lonely, and I'm going to hate it at times. But there is just so much to learn from this position, get my foot in the door for the professional world, learn the behind-the-scenes of a workplace other than at a daycare, network!, and be that leader I've always seen myself becoming one day.

I'm scared, sure, but I know this is where my life is supposed to go next. The South isn't through with me yet. I'm very excited for this next year.

I need to buy a car though...which means more saving, less boozing.